L'Amour Kick Arse! English version
by Max le Fou A.K.A. ButtBadger
Summary: A new student comes at Acme Looniversity. No one seems to understand how is the skunk's mind. But Fifi is determinated to know it...


**L'amour kick ass!**

_Hi folks._

_I always wanted to write a fanfiction about Tiny Toon Adventures, especially a romance one with Fifi LaFume, a character that i like very strong (no, not because she's french! lol ) It took me a couple of years to find out the best story and I've finally found..._

_Because I'm French, I've also made a French version of the fanfic. Check it out if you want to learn more French :p_

_Anyway, because of that, my english is not so good, especially for write stories! So don't mind the possible grammar errors... If you're better than me at english and want to help me correct some things, I'll gladly accept and thank you! ;)_

_Beware, It's not so funny as the series because it's not my forte on stories ; and I'm not sure where to put some on it anyway... After all it's just a fanfic. And I've read TTA fanfictions which were more far away than that ;p_

_I've made Nigel Stinker on my own mind, i admit it (I've exaggerated it, of course :p )..._

_For the music (Yes you can listen to music when you're reading:p ) I advice you all the bands which Nigel listens. In translation, you can find Slipknot, Mötorhead, Rammstein, Korn... And some sweet guitar tunes for some moments (Except for "Tenacious D - F her gently" I don't know what examples i can tell :p ) I suggest you also some french old tunes like "La vie en rose" (if it's made with an accordion it's better ;p )_

_I hope you'll like this one shot story. :)_

_"And now my prologue's done!"_

_-- Max le Fou / ButtBadger_

All started by a morning, at Acme Looniversity

Our toon's class was on the point to start when Bugs Bunny entered, followed by a young skunk. He was black and white and looked like Pepe le Pew, somehow. But this skunk was completely clothed with blue jeans, had long and dark blue hairs, light blue eyes and looked like less exuberant. On his schoolbag, one could read rock band logos like those of SleepNot, Kron, Toonstein and Mötorbutt. He looked like not very sociable, but he was very cute for a skunk boy. He also had a guitar on his back.

Bugs says "Children, we have a new student on your class." and says to the skunk : "Don't be afraid. Introduce yourself." The boy let an ironic "Pfft" and quickly said "I'm Nigel Stinker. Nice t'meet you, guys." His voice looked like proud but shy.

Babs, who was looking at Nigel, thought about Fifi. She knew that the cute frenchie skunk will not resist to black skunks and waited for the moment where Fifi will jump at Nigel's neck and give him a lot of kisses, like she does usually... But nothing happened. Fifi was watching Nigel with her eyes rounded, like if she was surprised.

Nigel sat at the desk behind Fifi, giving her a simple look. He have see her but no more... Then the classes began.

More later, Babs, Fifi & Shirley get along together while the boys were playing football.

- Hey, Fifi, says Babs, That's weird. Looks like you're not in love with the new guy. It's a beautiful skunk like you love. Are you alright ?

- Huh _oui oui_... I zink. she answered with her french accent. _Je ne sais pas_... Vous are probably right, he's a cute skunk hunk, but... Zere's something bizarre inside moi ; which says "Don't do that, not now!"..."

Babs & Shirley's faces smiled in a funny way.

- Mmmmm... Like, Feef, i feel a strange love aura around you, er some junk! says Shirley.

- Moi? In love? Impossible, _Sacrebleu_! If i couldn't jump onto his arms, zere's surely a reason!" said Fifi.

At this moment, the 3 girls saw that Nigel wasn't playing football with the other boys. he was on a bench, alone. He was working on his guitar, ready to play on it.

- Looks like he's an artist. says Babs. But he isn't very sociable...

- He doesn't look like bad at all, therefore. says Shirley. Like, I don't feel a negative aura from him. He probably have a sad secret inside him or some junk..."

Nigel started playing guitar. The melody looked strange besides him. The tunes were like melancholy, slow, but full of hope. Looks like the song wanted to say "Life sucks, it's too sad, too sinister...but someday, all will be better..." The 3 girls were fascinated by the music. Fifi had even some tears on the eyes...

"Why is he a toon if he's so sad on his heart?" Fifi thinks.

Two days later, Nigel still was so distant and always played guitar during the school breaks. Finally, this day, Fifi took her decision. She sat near Nigel and watched him playing. While he still played, he looked at Fifi a short time before looking at the chords again. Fifi didn't say anything and still looked at him...

The bell rang with Gogo Dodo, calling for the classes. Nigel took his guitar on his back. "Zat was _magnifique_!" says Fifi sweetly. The black skunk made a quick smile. "Thanks." he simply says.

At the next break, Fifi went sit near Nigel for listen to his music. Looks like it didn't bother him. She passed all the break time to watching him. He was always playing the same couple of tunes. And all these songs had the same theme ; melancholy and hope mixed together.

When the schools stopped, Fifi ran to Nigel who was walking to the street : "Nigel! Wait for moi!" Surprised, he stopped. Fifi joins him and says : "We take zee same way. You would like to get along with me?" Nigel nods, wondering what does she want.

While they were walking, Fifi asked him a lot of questions, without asking too much. He always answered with a simple word each time, like if he didn't want to talk about it. She asks him :

- Which school you were before Looniversity?

- At Perfecto Prep" he answers.

Then, Fifi thought that she found the problem of Nigel. Being in the same school as Roderick & Rubella was surely not a good thing for the mind.

"How eet was, zere?" Fifi asked. Nigel answered : "What do you want?" Surprised, Fifi says :

- What do you mean?

- I can understand that you like my music and that you want to listen to it... But why are you asking me all this questions?"

Fifi thought. She even didn't know. She finds him interesting but she don't know why. "If it's for making fun of me like the others, you're on the wrong way." says Nigel.

Upset, Fifi shouts : "What th..._Sacrebleu_!" The she runs at her home, letting Nigel here, thinking : "How rude! He's not better than the Perfecto Prep guyz!" Nigel, watches her go away. He was angry at himself, so much that he kicks a pole light several times until it really hurts him.

The next morning, Fifi looked sad. She thinks that she didn't had to find Nigel a rude guy. After all, maybe she asked too much, so he was right... But she didn't wanted to make fun of him anyway. She was just interested about him, that's all... Finally she decided to make apologies to him when he will back.

When Nigel comes, Fifi runs to him.

- Nigel, I want to talk to vous!

- Me too, Fifi, I need to talk too."

Then, on a single voice, the two skunks say "I'm so sorry for last night... No no it's me..." They laugh together happily. It's the first time Fifi could see Nigel laugh. It so much heats her heart.

Fifi says :

- Nigel, I want to apologize with inviting vous at my house for dinner. You would like?

- Of course i would! Anyway, You will can help me for my french homework tonight? I'm not very good for french. Because you got the accent, i thought..." he lets the quote unfinished.

- _Bien sûr, ça serait avec plaisir_!" answered Fifi. (Of course, it will be a pleasure!)

- You would like me to play some guitar too?

- Oh oui, that will be cool! I love so much your music!"

At the evening, Fifi & Nigel walks at Fifi's home. Nigel was more opened during the chats. He even begins to ask questions to Fifi too. Nigel's parents have disappeared somewhere and now he lives in an orphanage in Acme Acres. He plays guitar since he's a child and would like to resell his own to get an electrical one. He knows Roderick & Rubella and didn't kept a good souvenir of them... He also remember that he was on the tiers during the Acme Bowl and that he had seen Fifi there for the first time...

Suddenly, he looks at a poster on a wall. There was a rock band made of felines on it one could read "The Black Kats on live the April 21st"

- Wow! says Nigel. The Black Kats on live here in one week!! I must buy the tickets for it!

- You know zis band?

- Yup, it's one of the greatest Dark Metal band ever on Europa!

- What eez a dork metal?" asks Fifi. Nigel looks at her with big eyes, like if she was an alien. Fifi was wondering if he haven't made a mistake again.

- Welll... How I can explain?... It's a style of rock more dark and aggressive... When you'll come at my house, I'll show you." say the skunk with a smile. Fifi smiles too and nods.

Then, they continue the walk. The Acme city dump where lived Fifi was at only a few meters when suddenly, something big falls in front of them. Something that Fifi knew well "Elmyra!!!" The animal-lover kid catches Nigel "Oooooooh!!! The cute kitty-witty!! A brand new pretty kitty-witty just for me!!! Booh he stinks and he's badly clothed!! Elmyra gonna change you that!" she says like as usual. Fifi watches the scene, afraid. Nigel was paralyzed of fear, the eyes widely open, without knowing what to do.

He lets Elmyra take him to her house. Too busy with Nigel, she hadn't paid attention to Fifi. Taking her chance, the purple skunk follows Nigel & Elmyra discreetly.

Once they are in the house, Elmyra locks Nigel in a big cage and says : "I'm gonna prepare you a bath, my kitty-witty. don't move!" before going to the bathroom. Fifi jumps inside by an opened window and runs near the cage. Nigel was already trying to snap the bars. "I'm going to get vous out of here!" Fifi whispers while she opens the cage door.

After a while, when Elmyra comes cage and begins to moan, as usual : "Bwaaaaah my kitty-witty has escaped!" She looks at the open window and shouts "I'll find you, kitty-boy, you hear me?"

The two skunks runs away, then goes hide on a dark street.

- Are vous alright, Nigel?

- I think so... This girl is completely nuts!

- Why vous didn't reacted? You surely could hit her with your guitar so you could escape from her, non?" Nigel looks at Fifi deeply and took a time before answer, uncomfortable : "I... I don't like violence. I'll never hit somebody, even if my life depends of that."

Fifi looks at Nigel in the eyes. She found that adorable, someone who hates violence like that.

- You gonna make fun of me, now that you know that?" he says, sadly.

- Why you asking me zat?

- Because that happened each time that this part of my mind have been revealed. Everybody used that weakness of mine to make of me the foil of the class, then of the school..."

Fifi understands suddenly. Now she knew why Nigel was so closed on himself. The Perfecto Prep's other guys had surely made his life hard. She sweetly strokes Nigel's cheek and says : "I'll never make fun of vous for anythink... And your secret will be kept. I promise vous." Nigel smiles and says "_Merci_" in french. He feels better.

It was almost night when they come to Fifi's Cadillac home. They enters inside and sits on the backseats. "It's a great den! says Nigel. It looks very underground-styled I think!"

First, they starts by the french homeworks. Nigel was really bad at it, But for him, it seems easier with Fifi. He says that and that makes Fifi giggles... Once the homeworks done, Nigel takes his guitar and starts playing. This time, he plays new melodies that he never played at school. Fifi was fascinated...

The time passed, Nigel looks at his watch :

- Darn! 11:30PM already! I needa go home!

- Non, please stay a little bit! says Fifi. The streets are very dangerous at zis time! Here, you are, how you say, in secure!

- But...

- Vous stay here for zee night!!"

Nigel nods with a giggle and sits back.

- It doesn't bother you?

- Ze only zing which can bother me eez to know vous outside all alone!"

They pass one half hour talking together before sleep, her on the backseats, him on the carpet near...

At the morning, Nigel wakes up slowly, a sweet feminine odor tickling his muzzle. Half asleep, he smiles happily and huggles more tightly his sheet...

Suddenly he thinks... a sheet???? He didn't remembered having one when he slept. He looks at what he holds on his arms and saw Fifi's cute fluffy tail. The skunk was still asleep and didn't noticed that her tail was hugged. Nigel stands up sweetly and let the sweet purple and white tail go ; then he sits on the backseats, watching Fifi.

She wakes up 3 minutes later. She looks at Nigel with a smile.

They finally go to school together one half hour later.

Fifi joins her two friends Babs & Shirley and tells them what happened last evening with Nigel, without mention the secret that she promised to keep. Then, she preferred say that Nigel made Elmyra run away with his guitar.

- He looks really courageous for someone who's often alone. say Babs

- Oh you know,..." Fifi took a long time to find her quote "I think zat he have his own world and one needs a lot of time for understanding him. But once you know him good, he's very sweet and kind..."

Babs & Shirley grins at Fifi a little bit.

- Like, i sense some kind of waves from you, Feef, or some junk! says Shirley.

- Zat is not true!... Or maybe eet eez... _Je ne sais pas_!" says Fifi, outraged.

- What do you feel when he's around? asks Babs

- _Je_... _Je ne sais pas_... I just feel good, that's all...

- And what does he feels with you?

- I think he's considering moi as a good friend, nothing else...

- Did you asked him?

- Non"

And Fifi realized that Nigel wasn't on his usual bench. Where did he could go??

She finally sees him when the class begins. She asks him where he was. he just replies : "Mmmjust a couple of things to fix..." The class starts but Fifi is wondering a ton of questions...

When the french class ends, Nigel goes discreetly Pepe le Pew, the french teacher.

- Sir, I need some advices. says the young skunk.

- Uhuh... says Pepe with his french accent. Oui, what eez eet, Nigel?

- Well, you know Fifi laFume, right?

- How I couldn't? She's my best student!"

Nigel giggles, then he says :

- Hehe that's true... Okay...huh how i can say... I know that you're the professional in french and love, so i was wondering if...

- Haha you're in love with Fifi, non?"

Nigel begins to blush horribly. "Wut??? nonononono not at all!...huh maybe yes, i don't know..." Pepe puts a paw on Nigel's shoulder and smiles.

- Go ahead, boy. Your secret will be well kept. says Pepe.

- _Merci_, chief... In fact i'm not sure of anything at the moment... But I would like to look nice for her. So i think she will like if i was better in french. So I was wondering if you know a good way to take more french classes..." Pepe makes a big smile.

- Hehe zis eez la good idea! Unfortunately I don't have enough time for make extra french classes, with zee school and all that... Anyway, I know a good way which can help vous..."

During several days, Nigel passed less time with Fifi, preparing his surprise for her. Pepe have suggested him a book and a tape for french lessons. At the same time, He already have prepared the other surprise... Fifi found weird that Nigel was less here... Sometimes he even falls asleep during some classes. When she asks what happened to him, he always replies "Dun worry, all is ok... It's just some revisions at home..." Fifi was more worried about him...

But one day, Nigel comes to the school, very happy. He comes to Fifi who was on the bench where they talked for the first time... Nigel takes two pieces of red paper on his pocket : "Fifi, he says with a blush, you would like to go with me at the Black Kats concert tomorrow?"

Fifi don't say anything during a moment, then pounces Nigel, giving him a kiss on the cheek : "_Oh Nigel, Bien sûr_!" she says in french. Then she sighs "I was wondering what happened to you, vous were so distant these days, I was worried..." Nigel don't say a word. HE was like paralyzed. The kiss was looping on his head and his heart and the place where Fifi put the kiss was tickling Nigel... "Nigel, _ça va_? Wake up!" Fifi shakes Nigel a lil bit and he could get his mind again. "Euhh Yeah yeah i'm alright... I'm glad that you like it." he smiles.

The french classes have just ended. Nigel comes to Pepe again, discreetly.

- Hey chief!

- Ah Nigel! says Pepe. How are your french lessons?

- Nicely! But i need some help again!

- What eez eet?

- Fifi gave me a kiss and... I've been like paralyzed... And since that, i can't stop thinking about that. I have the scene looping on my head!

- Hehehe That's what i thought!" Pepe smiles.

- Whaddaya mean?

- You love her, my boy.

- Wut? Nooooo impossible!... Really?

- Eet eez completely a love reaction, what you felt... Way to go, sonny. Show her that you love her!

- But how? There's surely a good way for that!

- Well for start, invite her at le restaurant. But a real one, okay? Not the Weenie Burger!

- Okay. Then?

- Then, wait zee good moment, and tell her what you feel. And if you say it in french, it's better! It's the language of love...

- Okay, sounds easy... Then after?

- Well... huh... Anyway, never give up. If it's not tonight, It will be the next one!

- Huh okay..." Nigel wasn't very sure. He was aware that Pepe wasn't very good for the after-feelings-revealed. Finally Nigel thinks that he will improvise. He decided to invite Fifi at the restaurant after the concert.

In the concert room, there was only 15 minutes remaining before the show... Nigel have put his best grunge clothes : completely on blue jean, as usual, but there was more rock band logos on him everywhere. One could see those of the Black Kats, of course, but also those of Gamecubus, Children of Bo-DOOM, Metalitoon,... Fifi, have put some cute clothes, simple. She wasn't very sure of the style needed for the music, Nigel didn't had time to show her. The young skunk looked all shy with Fifi. They walked to the middle of the public, at 20 feet from the scene. "Fifi, gimme your hand, so we won't be lost on the people." The purple skunk nods and takes Nigel's hand while they swim on the people. While he was holding her hand, Nigel felt his heart beating loudly... Fifi also got her heart beating while she was feeling Nigel's heat running on her body...

Finally the lights turns off, letting only one light on the scene. Five shadows appears, the drummer gives the rhythm,... Then a huge wave of riffs and rhythms explode in front of the public where the first rows begins to make pogos... It was a very speedy rock style, very loud and where the singer was burping and singing at the same time!

Nigel was doing pogos with the others when he saw Fifi, took by the public's pogos, going away altought herself. By the panic, she seems to call for help... Listening to his courage, Nigel jumps onto the public, and they lifted him all along. Nigel tries to approach where Fifi was with "swimming" on the public. He finally joins the skunkette and lifts her with him, inviting her to join his "people-swimming". Holding Fifi's hand tightly, he guides themselves more at the back of the public mass, where it was more quiet.

Nigel falls on the ground and catches Fifi on his arms.

- _Sacrebleu_! she shouts. These people are very rude!

- I can tell. Nigel nods. I should tell you about that before...or we should stay here on the back... Forgive me, Feef...

- That's not your fault, Nigel, Don't worry... Thank you for saving moi..." says Fifi.

Suddenly Nigel realized that he still was holding Fifi on his arms. He blushes horribly and puts her on her feet.

Where they are, they couldn't be stomped by the pogos, but because Fifi was more small than Nigel, she couldn't see the scene. Then Nigel got an idea. He suggested to lift Fifi on his shoulders. She agrees with enthusiasm.

Nigel was a scared boy, but he was strong ; because he could lift Fifi on his shoulders during all the concert without miss anything from the show! The concert was great. Fifi even could do the lighter trick during a slow. It was the first time she could do that on her life. She seems to like the music, Even if it's not her favorite style...

When the concert ended, and then they get out, Fifi & Nigel were very happy. They have passed a great evening, although the beginning. Nigel thinks "Okay it's time, now!" then he asked : "Huh Fifi,...You would like to go at the restaurant with me? I know a good french one not far from here.". Fifi smiles and nods happily.

They walk together during a while, and 5 minutes later, they enters inside a restaurant called "_La Patte Gourmande_" They take a table and look at the menu. This one was full of formulas that Nigel didn't knew. His experience of the restaurants was limited by Weenie Burgers. Fifi helped him to choose a "_rosbif aux lentilles_", and she took some "_moules farcies à la béarnaise_"...

The dinner was great. Nigel was surprised by the taste of the french meat and guessed that he liked it. Fifi enjoyed the dinner too. She haven't often the occasion to eat her "mother-food"...

When they just finished, Nigel decided to try himself what he learned. He's going to see if Pepe's method will work. "Fifi, says Nigel sweetly, there's something i would like to say." Fifi looks at him deeply with a smile. Then, in a great effort for him, he moves his lips the best he can and articulates "_Tu es une très jolie fille!_" in french. Fifi open deeply her eyes as she surprised and applause Nigel with a smile, very happy. "_Magnifique_! You could say that i'm a pretty girl in french!" Then she continues in her mother tongue :

- _Et tu es un joli garçon! _(And you are a pretty boy too!)

- Hehe, giggles Nigel, _Parle doucement, j'apprends tout juste. _(Please talk slower, I'm still learning)

- _C'est super! Tu parles vraiment bien! Tu as un très bon accent! _(That's great! You talk it very well! You have a good accent!)

_- Merci, Fifi... Il y a tant de choses que je voudrais dire comme ça. Mais il faut que je travaille plus. _(Thank you, Fifi. There's so much things i would like to say like that. But i need to work more for that.)

_- Je suis sûre que ça ne sera pas trop dur pour toi. _says Fifi, holding Nigel's hand (I'm sure it will not be too hard for you)

_- Tu sais, je..." _Nigel had some problems finding his words and continues in english. "That's why I wasn't here so often these last days. I was learning french... I've done it for you, Feef.

- You done that for moi? says Fifi, blushing. Then the waiter came with the note. While Nigel was paying, he asked to Fifi "Can I call you someday?" She answered "_Bien sûr_! I'm going to give vous my phone number!" en she gave it to him with a smile.

Nigel walked with Fifi to her home. When they were in front of the entrance, she said sweetly "Merci for this wonderful evening, Nigel!" and gives him a kiss on the cheek. then she enters into her "garden". She takes a look behind her, and saw that Nigel didn't moved since the kiss. He looked like all dreaming, like the last time.

- Nigel, you should go home ; zee street isn't zee best place for sleep! says Fifi giggling.

- Huh?...Ah yes..euh... _Bonne nuit Fifi_" he says in french

- _Bonne nuit, mon petit sconse adoré_!" she answers (Good night my little skunk hunk!)

One week passed after the concert. Our two skunks seems to be more close of each one other. They pass almost all the time together, separating only when they go to their houses. At the mornings, Nigel was waiting Fifi near the Acme city dump entrance. And at the evening, Nigel joins her until they reach her house. At school, Nigel felt more and more opened with the others. Because he was following Fifi everywhere, he could met and know more her friends. Nigel began to have his very own place at Looniversity. He was surprised of the difference between Perfecto Prep & Acme Looniversity.

A Friday evening, Nigel propose Fifi to join him to the center city. She nods happily.

It was the middle of spring. The streets at the night began to turn on their lights one by one. "It's beautiful, there. says Nigel. Very shiny and well decorated." Fifi nods with a smile. "It reminds moi Paris. she says. Zee grand streets are so _magnifique_ at zee evening!". Nigel nods with a smile and an envy sigh. Since he knew Fifi, He became completely fan of everything french.

One moment, they stop in front of a musical instruments shop. Nigel looks inside, his muzzle poking the glass, the eyes widely open. Fifi looks too. On the shop, there was a superb red and white Flyin'V guitar. Near it, there was written "Flyin'V Ripson customized Fennec -20 - only 650$"

- It looks so great, don't you think, Feef? says Nigel

- Oui, eet eez a great one. says Fifi with a smile.

- I promise you, one day I'll have the same... And when I'll have it, I'll play the best songs i can with it!"

Fifi smiles. But she knows that it's not for today. Nigel was as poor as herself. She knew that Nigel will took weeks, even years, to get the money needed for.

They enters inside the center town park. There was a lot of couples of lovers around, and also an accordion player lion on the central gazebo. Nigel suddenly got an idea. He asks Fifi to go sit on a bench near them and that he will join her after a while. Fifi, surprised, nods and go sit. Nigel goes talk with the lion, giving him a pound on his hat. The lion smiles and nods with a wink. Then Nigel goes sit with Fifi.

The accordionist played his next song. A sweet melody begins to flow around the park ; a melody that Fifi recognized at once : Nigel asked the lion if he could play "La vie en rose". "Ohhh Nigel! How did vous know that eet was my favorite song?" asked Fifi, between the astonishment and the happiness. "Well, says Nigel while he scratches his neck, a little bit uncomfortable, I didn't know it was your favorite. I just knew that it's a french song so i thought you'll like it.." Fifi giggles sweetly.

- Do you know what zee song talks about? she asked.

- Huhhh i guess about a pink life, that's all i know for the moment...

- Eet eez a love song, Nigel." says Fifi with a smile, her eyes shining.

Nigel feels more uncomfortable. That was exactly what feelings he have, but he thought it was going too fast. The two skunks look at the lion still playing. Fifi, her heart beating, felt her fluffy tail moving by itself to Nigel's own. She couldn't help it. Nigel's tail, a little bit surprised first, rubs Fifi's tail by itself, the two tails hugging each other sweetly while their owners were watching the accordion player. Nigel looks at Fifi. She smiles with a happy giggle. Nigel smiles and giggles too. The two tails were cuddling on a dance which seems to follow the song's rhythm. Fifi puts her head on Nigel's shoulder and he puts his paw on her shoulder...

More later, Nigel accompanied Fifi at her home.

- What do you do, tomorrow? she asks.

- Mmm nothing special. Except that I'll come to see you!" says Nigel with a wink.

Fifi giggles, then she hugs tightly the black skunk, letting a little "Le sigh" before let him go.

It was completely clear : they were in love for each other...

At the same time, more far away from here, someone was watching them. Montana Max was preparing a bad plan. He didn't liked the time where Fifi had "skunked" him because he wanted her fur, essential ingredient for a voodoo ritual which will make him more rich (what does this kid thinks?!) He wanted, first a revenge, but also take the fur he need...

Since several days, he followed all the story between Fifi & "Stinker-Looser" as he calls him. But he still didn't know the black skunk's secret. So he thinks he have to eject Stinker-Looser first, then get Fifi's fur... Because Stinker-Looser was too well built (not so much as Arnold the Pitbull but more than Montana Max himself) it was out of question to took his own fur... Monty have to eject Stinker-Looser by the ruse... Suddenly the rich kid found an idea. He calls his butler "Call Bimbette right now!"

The next morning, Nigel & Fifi were gone to pass a whole day together. They started by eating at Weenie Burger, not so far from the Acme city dump. Nigel tells Fifi about the time where he worked for the Weenie Burger of his previous city for buy his acoustic guitar.

- It wasn't so bad. Usually the students who works there are all the same. I was the only different guy. The time where I've said that I listen to metal tunes they made those faces!" he makes a funny face which makes Fifi giggle. "Some customers are really weird sometimes. Like ; they says they want some ketchup, when we say that they don't need to ask us for because we put some automatically, then they say that at Windonald's they said to them to tell us that!"

- That eez bizarre!" Fifi giggles.

Suddenly, the fast food's door rings and some admiring whistles could be heard. Nigel turns back and saw a beautiful pink skunk coming into his direction. He was subjugated. Fifi recognized her arch-enemy and felt the jealousy coming all over her body.

- Excuse-me, I'm looking for a cute skunk named Nigel Stinker. is that you?" says the pink skunk with a cute voice.

- It depends of what you want from him... answers Nigel.

- In fact, I'd like to hear him play some guitar." she giggles.

Nigel scratches his chin, thinking... Why this cute creature is interested by a poor skunk like him?... And why Fifi looks like all red in front of her??... Suddenly he understood all the trick. Uninterested, he replies quietly : "Mmm it's not me... Dunno this guy either..." Surprised, the pink skunk says "Aww c'mon Nigel, I know it's you! Why you are with this poor frenchie? You deserve better than that, don't you think?" At these words, Fifi was on the point to cry. Nigel just answers : "You maybe gonna find me bizarre, but i think she have more charm than you...without offense, of course.". Fifi opens her eyes widely, surprised, and it's the turn of the pink skunk to be jealous. "Fine! If you say so..." she simply says before get out of the Weenie Burger.

She turned on a street where Montana Max was waiting for her. "So, Bimbette, Did it worked?" he asked. The pink skunk was on the point to cry. "It's the first time that a skunk resist to my beauty!! He ignored me like if i was nothing" Monty let a big exploding "WHAT????!!!!" which runs out at several kilometers away... Then Bimbette wanted the money that Monty had promised for the work. But Monty refused... But after having "skunked" him, he finally gave the price...

Meanwhile, at the Weenie Burger, Fifi was drying her big eyes with a handkerchief that Nigel gave to her "Eez that true, Nigel? You really think that i have more charm than her?" Nigel holds Fifi's hand between his owns "What i think really, is that nobody can be more beautiful than you, Feef. Even if she's pretty, You're more cute than her for a thousand times." then he says with a giggle "Plus she don't have any accent and i hate pink! I always preferred purple, even when i didn't know you!" Fifi giggles and dry her tears. They sigh together, happy to be together...

Monty was upset by his failure, but he had a plan B... He decided to go see Hamton J. Pig. Monty knew that the pig have a feeling for the purple skunk...

The kid knocked the door and Hamton opens it. Surprised, he says :

- Monty? What d'you want??

- My dear Hamton, I have a news which will interest you for sure... says Monty. D'you know Stink...huhhh Nigel?

- Mmyeah, sorta. Fifi introduced him to me, once. They pass alot of time together...

- You don't have the impression that something is going on between them?

- What do you mean?

- They go out together, my pig!" says Monty with a laugh.

Hamton felt the anger running on his body. "You should talk to this guy, Hamton. I'll not let him took my girlfriend if I was you." Hamton knew that Monty have something on his mind for telling him that, but his jealousy was so high that he couldn't pay attention to that. "You have any idea of what I can do?" Hamton asks. Monty smiles like the Grinch and answers "Yeah, I have a plan... And if all goes well, you will have Fifi back and I'll pay you 1000$ in cash!" Hamton accepted, more for Fifi than for money...

Nigel & Fifi had a lot of fun in the center city. Shopping, arcade games, walking on the streets, they done everything... When they walk, their tails was wrapping each other or sometimes they were holding their hands. They looked like a real couple... At 4PM, they went to Nigel's home.

It was a whole building which belonged to the orphanage. Nigel lived on a simple little bedroom. There was just a little bed, a closet with some posters of rock bands on it, a lot of rock banners on the walls, and the one of Acme Looniversity up to the bed. The guitar was resting at the side of the bed, and a Walkman was on the bed, near a french learning method book and tape. Fifi saw it and Nigel blushed. "Oh, you learn french with a method and a tape?" she says. Nigel nods, still blushing. Fifi holds him on her arms. She understood that he was doing that for her. "Oh Nigel zis eez so adorable!" Nigel rubs Fifi's hairs while he hugs her. Then he look at her cute eyes deeply. Their muzzles began to move closer to each other...

Suddenly, someone knocked the door. A little bit disappointed, Nigel goes open the door. It was Hamton. "Hi, Nigel." he said. The pig saw Fifi behind Nigel, making him more upset "I need to talk to you, man to man...well pig to skunk." surprised, Nigel follows Hamton after asked Fifi if she could wait for him.

There was nobody in the internal-garden of the building. Hamton was upset like never before.

- What's wrong, Hamton? asked Nigel. You don't look very well.

- What kind of relations you have with Fifi? asks Hamton.

- Well... I admit, I'm not sure myself. But, I think we love each other."

Hamton tried to contain his anger but it was impossible. He exploded. "Fifi was MY girlfriend before you came!" Nigel eeps. "Wut? You two went out together?"asked the skunk.

- Huh...not really..." the pig says, hesitating. "But i had feelings for her and she had some for me too!

- Are you sure? She never told me.

- I'm ready to fight for save her from you! says Hamton, moving his fists in front of him.

Nigel felt his fear of violence taking him and backs up. "I don't want to fight with you!" says Nigel. Hamton says, his voice full of anger "I would not to fight with me either!" Hamton walks into Nigel who was still backing up. Suddenly the skunk says "Wait! Don't you think that Fifi have her word to say about all that??" Hamton stops, surprised. Nigel have just got a point. "We are both in love with her, right? So It's to her to choose between us, no?" says Nigel. Hamton thinks deeply then finally says :

- Yes, you're right, Let's go join her and ask.

- Useless." says a voice near them.

The two boys look to where the voice came from and they saw Fifi who have secretly followed Nigel. "I have heard all of your sayings and I have made my choice!" she have tears on her face and looked very upset. "I will go out with...nobody!!!!" she says before leaving quickly... Some sobs could be hear on the echo of the exit.

The two boys stay still for a while, realizing how is the situation. Their two hearts have just broke... It's finally Nigel who can't contain himself : he falls on his knees, hugs tightly his tail and cries loudly.

Hamton looks at the skunk. In the scene he could see now, he can saw all the love that Nigel have for Fifi. The pig felt very sorry and it makes him think about himself. Finally, if he got this jealousy, it wasn't a jealousy of Nigel. Hamton was just scared that Nigel can hurt the purple skunk. He just wanted to protect her. But seeing this heart-broken skunk made him think that he didn't need to be worried, and now he have broken the cute couple. He falls on his knees and shouts : "I'm the biggest idiot ever! It's all my fault! I was too worried and i didn't had to!!" Nigel stands up, tring to stop crying, and says :

- You love her too, don't you?

- Yes... And i was just worried about her... All is my fault!!

- Don't say that, Ham. 't's not your fault..." says Nigel, without knowing if he was right or not. Suddenly, Hamton realized something : No, it wasn't his fault!

- You're right, Nigel! It's all because of Montana Max!

- Wut? Whaddaya mean?

- That's him who told me about you two... He wanted to broke our hearts or something..."

Nigel's suffering is suddenly replaced by hate and anger. Then a bad smile appears on his face. He looks at Hamton and says : "I think this kid shall pay for something, don't you think?" Hamton nods.

Montana Max have saw all the scene. He was very pleased! The plan haven't worked as he expected, but he got what he wanted : Now, nobody is around Fifi ! He just have to activate the plan A2 : Capture the purple skunk!

Fifi was crying on the backseats of her home. She have the heart broken. She loves Nigel, but she also likes Hamton. Seeing them on the point to fight for her had already broken her heart ; but the fact that they were going to ask her to make a choice that she can't do was too much. She wasn't sure of what to do.

Suddenly, she ears a familiar voice call for her : "Fifi, where are you my little pigeon? I need vous!" It was Pepe le Paw's voice, Fifi's favorite teacher... Desperate, she runs outside. Only him could help her on this kind of situation.

She approaches the voice's source and found just a simple tape player where Pepe's voice was still calling. Fifi looks at the player with her big eyes... Suddenly, some poles made of steel falls around her! "_Sacrebleu_!!!" she says surprised.

Trapped on the cage, she tried in vain to spread the poles. But the steel was too hard. A bad laugh could be heard, and Montana Max jumps from a vehicle which held the cage, accompagnated of his butler and Arnold.

- Hahahaa!!!! At last I've got you!! This pig is so naive!

- Monty! Why have you trapped moi?! How vous...?!

- Hehe that's simple! I'm still on this voodoo ritual which will make me richer... Haha Poor stupid pig and Stinky-Looser! They have their hearts broken and you fall on my nets! I need to thank them someday!" Monty laughs badly again.

- And I suppose that zee time with Bimbette was because of you too?

- Tadaa! You win!!... Or for better say, you loose!!! hahahaaaa!!

Fifi felt more tears coming from her eyes... So all this story was made by Monty... Too weak for shout, broken and tired by the suffer, she says with an inaudible voice "_Au secours_!"...

Hamton & Nigel walk to the Acme city dump. they decided to make apologies to Fifi before make Monty pay for all that. They made peace, but Hamton still needed time for completely trust Nigel.

They enters inside the city dump and they knock the door of the home-car.

- Fifi, we come for make excuses! says Nigel.

- Yes, finally you're right. It was dumb of us to ask you to choose! says Hamton.

- We understand that you don't want to see us anymore, therefore,...

- ...but we really want to apologize."

No response. Worried, Nigel put a ear on the door. No noise inside. "I feel scared. She don't answer" Hamton goes get an eye on the windows while Nigel still knocks on the door. Later, Hamton comes back and says : "There's nobody. The car is empty." Nigel nods. "I guess she isn't come back home yet. We should let her a note." Hamton nods and the two boys look for a piece of paper on the city dump.

Hamton, suddenly, says : "Nigel, look! Where that come from?" Nigel looks. He saw some chains which apparently were there since recently. A dollar was resting near the chains ; And it have a sweet odor of female skunk. Realizing the situation, the two boys understand together : "Montana Max!"

More later, at Hamton's house, several toons were thinking. Hamton & Nigel have called some of their school pals for asking help. Nigel, who have passed a big part of his life with war simulation video games, had made a plan.

"Ok, toonsters, he says, Here's the plan : Monty have surely posted some guards on the entrance. So we will have to pass by behind. Buster, Babs, You will go keep the guards away with your disguise talents. Dizzy, you will make a way through the mansion's wall. then the teams "SleepNot" & "Mötorbutt" will enter the base. Each team will have to search for Fifi. Calamity Coyote have made us vibrating transmitting devices. The team which will find Fifi in first will call the other with the transmitter. then the other team will join them... Plucky, Hamton, Shirley, Dizzy, you will be the "SleepNot" team. Calamity Coyote, Sweety, Furball and myself will be the "Mötorbutt" team. Any questions?"

Nobody talks. Except Calamity who takes a panel which displays ""Mötorbutt" team rules!" Everybody giggles and Nigel makes a little smile. "The bad kids season is open, toonsters!" he shouts. Everybody goes to Monty's mansion, then.

Fifi was prisoner of a weird machine which force her to keep her eyes open in front of a TV. "I'll make you pay for the time you skunked me! Don't worry, it will not hurt you. It will just torture your mind!" Monty laughs and switch on the TV... It displays a animated show with a kid named Billy was repeating "Destroy us aaaaaall! Destroy us aaaaaall! Destroy us aaaaaall!" in loop. It wasn't really a torture for Fifi. It even made her giggle. Monty changed his strategy and the tape. This time, it was a movie with some kind of colored aliens with a TV on the belly, a TV antenna on the head, and were talking with nonsense words... It didn't worked either... Then Monty said "Well, i didn't wanted to go so far but you force me!" He changed the tape, and this time it was another animated show with a girl, a gray monkey and a talking bag... Horrified, Fifi calls for help and tried to free herself from the torture...

Buster & Babs have just started to keep the guards away with their disguises of Yosemite Sam and Elmer Fudd. Dizzy makes the twister and goes blast the wall. Nigel whispers "_Chargez_!" in french and the two teams runs inside the hole. ""SleepNot", take left! "Mötorbutt", follow me!" says Nigel before run inside a corridor...

At his office, Montana Max was preparing some tools for rip Fifi's fur when Arnold's voice says on a speaker "Herr Boss! We have intrrruders!" Monty switch on some control screens and saw one of the teams sneaking on a corridor. "Capture them!" shouts Monty on his microphone...

The "Motorbutt" team continued to make his way through the big mansion. Finally they found the torture room where Fifi was still stuck on the torture chair. Nigel activated his transmitter and goes free Fifi who felt on the ground. She looked completely tired and was mumbling "Swipper, no swiping! Swiper, no swiping!" Nigel shakes Fifi, trying to wake her up in vain. Finally he found a radical way : he french kiss her deeply... Smack! Fifi gave to Nigel a big and noisy slap on his cheek! Nigel giggles and hugs Fifi "Glad that you're ok, Feef! Me and some friends are come to save you!" says Nigel." Fifi says, happily "I know that you will come to save moi, my heroes!!" Suddenly, a laugh echoes on the room. Monty was at the door with Arnold.

- Hahahaha!! Stinker-Looser, you're more stupid that i expected! You really thought I'll not see you?" says the kid.

- Don't say "Hurray" too fast, Monty! says Nigel. Soon, our army will come help us and make you loose the fight!

- Hah you mean this "army" ?? Monty snaps his fingers and Arnold launch a big net which contained all the "SleepNot" team. Nigel was scared. then a cage falls into the two teams, making them prisoners. They were all trapped, now. "_Sacrebleu_!" shouts the black skunk. "Now nobody can stop me! I'll have the power of the money!!" laughed Monty. He enters the cage with his scissors, ready to cut Fifi's fur.

Nigel was very scared, but seeing this scene of Fifi threatened by Montana Max suddenly made his fear disappear. He jumps onto Monty and, holding his tail's tip near the kid's nose, he says, his voice full of anger : "Release all of us NOW or I'll freakin' skunk your freakin' head of rich!!" Monty isn't scared by the skunk and punched him high. Nigel is projected on the cage poles and falls. "Hah! You really think you can scare me?? I know your weakness, Stinker-Looser! You're scared of violence and never fight!... I'll not be afraid of a sissy girl like you, you coward!" Monty laughs evily. He have revealed Nigel's secret... Nigel looked around him, ready to be the foil of the group again...

Fifi saw Nigel's sadness and walks into Monty. "You evil rat! she says. I will never forgive vous!" then she tried to skunk Monty... But the kid have prepared the trick and put a gas mask. "Hah! you can't skunk me anymore!" Shouts Monty... Suddenly, a big crack could be hear and the kid falls down. Nigel had hit him with his acoustic guitar. "I'll never back up again, now! he shouts. I'm not scared anymore!... You were right Monty, I'm scared of violence. But just try to hurt Fifi and I'll not be afraid, i swear it!" Suddenly, a big white paw catches him, strangling him. It was Arnold "Sorrrry but i can't let you go!" Nigel felt not scared and said in french "_Fifi, enfuis-toi avec les autres_!" (Fifi, run away from here with the others!) Arnold says "What did you say?...Hey! Come back here, you!!!" Nigel thinks about a way to be free too. Suddenly he remembered the "Voyage of Kon Ducki" movie. he says "Ahh, mango juice!" A big mast falls into Arnold. Nigel jumps quickly out of the big hand and runs, joining the others.

The group went out to the hole made by Dizzy. Before they completely leave, Nigel and Fifi decided to skunk the hole together, just in case...

Fifi and all the class were saved!

Several days later, there was the prom nite of Looniversity. Nigel were with Hamton and their friends. "Nigel, says Hamton, you could save all of us! You have all my gratitude and my trust now!" Nigel smiles.

- Hehe thank you, Hamton... And...about this story with Feef... The skunk asks

- Don't worry, she's all yours! I'm currently mated with a cute piggy on the Internet! I think I'll still come bother you two for play but that's all." Nigel giggles. Hamton and him were best friends now. "What you two are talking about?" says Fifi, joining them. "Mmm well we were remembering our fight to save you." Fifi smiles. Hamton and Nigel have told her all the story and have accepted their apologies... Suddenly she heard a slow song beginning from the DJ. "Nigel, come with moi! I want to dance with vous!" Nigel blushes and nods.

Fifi and him danced together, hugging each other. Fifi whispers at the ear of the black skunk "Do you remember what you gave moi at Monty's house?" Nigel blushes more. "Huh y..y..yes but I...I think I've m..m..messed it because of the situation..." Fifi smiles and, before french kissing him passionately, says "Let moi show you, bad boy!"

THE END (?)

_Voila, that was my fanfiction! I hope you liked it..._

_I want to thank you all the friends and guys who supported me. Without that, maybe i couldn't finish it. :p_

_Personally, it's really my all-time favorite fanfiction after "L'Ultime Menace", my Zelda fanfiction. I like my Nigel character. Maybe I'll make him appear in some future fanfictions. ;)_

_Phew it's hard to write in english when it's not your mother tongue :p_

_I guess you found the cameos of "The Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy", "Teletubbies" and "Dora the explorer". Have you got the joke with the mast and the mango juice? lol this thing always made me laugh when i see this episode:p_

_I've discovered that the story is very close to the fanfic "Ohlala" by Daniel Brock... It was pure coincidence!! I agree that there some similar points between Lance and Nigel (They came both from Perfecto Prep, they are both not very sociable black skunks and they both fall in love with Fifi) But there's some differences too (For example, Nigel is some kinda coward at the beginning, Lance isn't on the whole story) And the story isn't the same either! just read it, you'll see! plus it's a good one..._

_My girlfriend told me there's also references to Wayne's World and Jimmy Neutron's movie... Pure coincidence again, i swear!!! oO_

_Mmmmwhat else to say?... I don't know :p_

_See you, guys, and thanks for stopping by :)_


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